No More Holding Hands In The Dark....DADT

When we send our young men and women off to war we often laud them as heroes for giving up their personal freedoms in order to defend ours. They give up the ability to do so many things that we take for granted on the average day, to put their lives on the line to make sure we can continue to live in freedom. This is a sentiment that has been passed around so much...and used for political gain...that it sometimes seems to be  cliche but it also happens to be totally true. When you give up the ability to go out on a Saturday night with your best freinds or simply spend a day watching t.v. and instead chose to do a service for your country in which you may not come home to enjoy those simple freedoms....you deserve to be considered a hero. So why do we draw a line at gay and lesbian soldiers and say, "Not these guys. They don't count." Does their life not carry the same value as a heterosexual soldiers life? Is not their sacrifice the same?

Not when we treat those same soldiers, who are making the same sacrifices, as criminals or predators because they happen to be gay. Such are the stories told by those dismissed under Don't Ask, Don't Tell....Such as Just-A-Joe the anonymous gay soldier who blogged about his time in the service, his unintentional coming out, and emminent dismissal. But nothing I can say will be as powerfull as their own words...

G.O.P....U.S.A....S.O.S.?

Meghan McCain is making me rethink politics again. As a young women and a Republican she is taking alot of very firm stances in favor of gay rights during a time when the Republican party seems to want unthinking obedience and ideological purity.  Most recently, McCain gave a speach at George Washington University that contained statements of definitive support for gay rights and marriage equality. In that same speach she claimed that the gay rights movement is "this generation's civil rights movement" and urged other progressive Republicans to speak out.

What to make of this?....A lone voice in the conservative wilderness?...or sign of changing times?

Courage and Sacrifice...LGBT Teens

To be out in high school...that to me at least, seems tantamount to smothering yourself in BBQ sauce and jumping into a tank full of starving Pihranna. The thought of dancing with a boyfriend at the prom is both wonderfull and terrifying at the same time. Having to fight to attend that prom against your school and resentfull classmates is a heroic act, unthinkable when many of us where in highschool. And coming out to my parents at that age....don't even get me started. However...lately the news has been filled with examples of courage and sacrifice on the part of LGBT teens. Some stories you may know...others you may not. but they paint a picture of extraordinary courage and the price we sometimes pay to be who we really are.

Remembering A Friend

Today these keys fail me...my heart fails me to find the words struggling to get out.


This morning I woke up to Jay telling me that he had bad news. My friend Dave...who earlier last year had come out to me as transgendered...had commited suicide. Dave was like my brother. All I am left with right now are memories and a wondering why.

What Is "Gay Family Values"?

This week Jay and myself Filmed a video for Youtube that tackled the issues of monogamy and crushes. It was a terribly hard video to make...mostly because Jay really had something he wanted to say and I am reticent to be as forthcoming as he was on a topic so intimate. That fact came across in our video as we did not edit out a disagreement between Jay and myself. So...long story short...viewers got to see a side of us they don't normally see. For being this candid we got a great deal of positive feedback...but also alot of shock and some negative response...and many questions. It was shocking for people to see us in this manner. Which brings us to my point, "what is gay family values?" both as a concept for life and the meaning of our Youtube channel? See the video and read on after the fold...

Don't Ask....Don't Make It Up As You Go Along

Wow that title would make for an even more awfull acronym than...DADT

It makes for even more awfull testimony in a Senate hearing regarding "Don't Ask Don't Tell"...yet thats exactly what Retired General John Sheehan did during his turn to testify. For those who haven't heard what happened, retired General Sheehan testified at said Senate hearing that because the Dutch army allows gays to openly serve in their armed forces...they were unable to prevent the overruning of Srebrenica... and the following massacre of Muslims, during the Bosnian War....huh?.....Video coverage of the hearing is easily available..but not as much fun as Rachal Maddows coverage below the fold...

Gay Activism Steps It Up

Not to Long ago in a previous post I mused that the future of the struggle for gay rights will have to move beyond the tactic of politely asking the powers that be for our due civil rights and on to more assertive forms of civil protest. Now, with Dan Choi's arrest, the topic is all over the net.

Well...I hate to give big fat "I told you so's"....o.k....no I don't....I told you so!....

Yesterday Lt. Dan Choi and Capt. Jim Pietrangelo, in protest over DADT, chained themselves to the WhiteHouse fence. On the surface Dan Choi and Pietrangelo's actions in chaining himself to the Whitehouse fence seem an ill timed gesture. The Army had just let him back on active duty and suspended his discharge. Are the lawmakers that pushed to get him reinstated feeling a bit upset by his actions? In addition, Congressional hearing are taking place discussing the need for a DADT repeal and public opinion, by and large, is with a repeal. Making lawmakers upset at this stage in the game may erode what little support there is in congress. Not that he should cease advocating for what he believes in but chaining yourself to the Whitehouse fence is bound to make you more enemies than friends...not the least because it can be interpereted as showboating in an effort for Lt. Choi to get his name back in the news.

But dialing our view back from the specific event of Dan Choi's arrest alot more took place on that day.

Touched

Today I want to talk about pornagraphy. I am going to be as frank as I can be about this topic so consider this your disclaimer now. If any of my dear readers have any qualms about this topic. This is your chance to hit the escape button. This is an incredibly difficult topic for me to talk about...not only because of my own experiences with it, but because the topic itself has so many permutations. It is nearly impossible to discuss it without someform of judgement...no matter how slight. It is not my intention to offer judgement against others. Heaven knows I have no right to that.  It is my intent to strip the topic down and perhaps see it from a different perspective...as much for myself as for my readers.

Small Voices

Hello everyone,

My blogging is sporadic lately which is giving me all kinds of blogger guilt. I have to say though, we've entered another lame news cycle of talking heads nattering on about why a DADT repeal is likely and the anti-gay activists going on and on about how ENDA will let men into the womens bathroom...yada yada yada. Not much that makes my ears perk up as if something of interest was actually happening....except this...



His voice is small...but soul is large. He's got more courage than the whole of congress...thats why he's my hero.

Compassion, and Scandal....Religion In The World Today

No matter your opinions of religion...or if you draw distinctions between religion and spirituality( as this blogger does)....there is no arguing that it has a profound effect on the world. Our spiritual lives can lead us to some incredible heights and some terribly dark lows...as human history readily attests. Jay and I often get critiscm for having spiritual beliefs. Their are those who feel that being gay automaticall excludes you from participating in a religion. To which I disagree. My feelings on religion is that it is a related, but separate thing from spirituality...the form that our spirituality takes is of less consequence than what we do with it. This idea extends into all facets of human existance. Give a human being a rock and they can turn to a variety of uses. It can be a tool to create with, or a weapon to harm others with....depending on the individual.

...and then theres the rare man that would turn something as mundane as rock into a thing of beauty...like Michealangelo's David. Everything has its positive and negative expressions that depend solely on us as people and what we chose do with it. To demonstrate my point... in current news is the story of the recent scandals surrounding the catholic church and Pope Benedict XVI...one of the most powerfull and outspoken anti-gay voices of our day....with a counterpoint from retired Bishop Desmond Tutu.

Is The World Changing?

Yesterday this blog had the honor of hosting a video of one young boy who all gave us hope for the world. I wish that feeling could have stayed for more than 24 hours...sadly, the realities of the world come crashing back to remind us that while hope exists...so does tragedy and that their are those out there who still need our help. That help may take many forms...as with the earthquakes in Haiti and Chile, blankets. food, and medicine were real ways that we could reach out and make a difference. And sometimes ...the only way we can help someone is to bear witness to what happened and let the world know that we are watching. Such is the case with the video of a Saudi man who was videotaped, dressed up in a police uniform and pretending to be an effeminate police officer pulling over a motorist. He then proceeded to imply to the pretend motorist (and camera man) that he could escape his situation by offering "comfort" he then bared his chest and fondled himself to music. Well....Youtube being what it is, the video went viral and got back into the hands of  Saudi authorities. Both men have since been arrested. Watch the video and read on below the fold.

Unless Ye Become As Little Children

How do kids really handle the idea of two men or two women who love each other? Take a gander...



This video was filmed by John Hill and Micah Schraft on a flip phone.. of all things..the day after Thanksgiving. Thats when Calen, who I would guess to be 6 or 7ish, decided to ask a very frank question about their relationship. You can plainly see that he wasn't used to the idea of two men being in love and getting married...it seemed to blow his mind for a second or two. Then he moved on to more important matters...like ping pong.

Telling Daniel and Selena was just as anti-climactic. If only the rest of the world could be that way...

Four False Faces...and one Heroine..

Hello Everyone,

Your Completely overloaded blogger is back with another edition. It seems that whenever I am able to consistently blog...nothing happens. Its the same old hurry up and wait stories about the HRC, Maggie Galagher popped up somewhere to say she's not anti-gay while simultaneously pushing a bans on gay rights, and/or someone stonewalling Don't Ask Don't Tell...blah blah blah...second verse, same as the first. Then...I take a day or two out and the poodoo hits the proverbial ventilation device. Case in point: We have been going through our transition with taking in our nieces and nephews and have been quite up to our eyeballs with kidstuff....so of course all the bats take that opportunity to escape the bellfry and cause anti-gay havoc.

Closets Kill....Come Out Senator Roy Ashburn

For those of you who haven't been following the online ruckus that has resulted from the DUI arrest of Bakersfield senator Roy Ashburn I don't blame you...I have barely had time to offhandedly scan the internet myself and only heard about it when it was broadcast on a local radio station. Needless to say I sprayed my coffee all over the windshield of my minivan as couldn't believe what I had just heard...they really should warn you to put down your cell phones and beverages before announcing that kind of stuff....sheesh.

Well...Its Happening.

Some of you may be wondering why blogging didn't happen yesterday. Still more of you may be aware that we have been considering bringing our 8 month old neice into our home on a foster basis while her mother goes through a drug treatment program. What you may not know is that she also has two boys ages 2 and 4 that have been in a group home the last few days while all of us "grown ups" figure out how we can best provide for them. Well...all three kids are coming to us, beginning with the boys tommorow. To hear the details, read on...only the names have been ommited, to protect the privacy of the kids.

Bill Moyers Hosts David Boies and Ted Olson

In a recent edition of Bill  Moyers Journal, Moyers sat down with David Boies and Ted Olson attorneys representing two gay couples in the federal lawsuit against the constitutionality of Prop 8. Since no cameras have been allowed in the courtroom for the trial and in all likelyhood will continue to be banned for the closing arguments, its nice to see Olson and Boies and to hear their opinions on the status of the trail in person. Both attorneys seem very positive about succeeding, even at the Federal Supreme Court, an attitude that I find astounding as well as encouraging. So far there case has been very sharp so I have no doubt that they know their stuff.

PBS does not allow their player to be embedded in other sites so I had to find a little taste  of the interview to share with you. Below you will find a Youtube synopsis of the interview but to see it in its entirety visit PBS . The full interview is well worth the watch so I hope you will go to the PBS site and check it out.