Wednesday, June 26, 2013

VICTORY!...... DOMA and Prop 8 are Gone!



In a double ruling, the United States Supreme Court today struck down the Defense  of Marriage Act by a 5-4 margin....AND.... dealt the final blow to Prop 8. Both are now gone.

Our family has been fighting Prop 8 since the day it was announced in 2008. Nearly as soon as we could get married did the news come someone would fight it...as we knew they would. We all had to move so fast to get married before the window closed that My husband and I had to marry a week before when we would have, which would have been my birthday and the anniversary of our domestic partnership. That day would also have been the day Prop 8 passed at the ballot box. A day we will always remember as being a very sad one. And yet here we are nearly five years and many court battles later....still standing and still married. Prop 8 has been such a big part of our lives for the last five years that it's stamp can never be undone. It launched us into activism...onto YouTube and this blog...and brought so many amazing people and experiences into our lives that I am almost grateful for it even as I celebrate its passing.

And DOMA too. I almost don't even know what to say because a part of me always feared that the Supremes would find a way to wiggle out of striking it down. I really can't believe it's gone as well. This, more than anything is the reason for the picture I have put at the top of this blog. Just like the destruction of the Death Star, DOMA has always been a similar instrument of tyranny...and its demise no less dramatic and far reaching. I know that for my whole life, I have believed and accepted that no government would accept or sanction and gay relationship.....that was just the world I came out in. Hell...DOMA was signed into law at about the same time that I came out, further underscoring the collective statement that gay people would be forever unprotected by the laws that would always treat us like strangers to those we love and spend our lives with. We were on our own and that was just the way it was. How amazing to be writing this day celebrating the end, not only of DOMA and Prop 8, but that way of thinking.

Between the Deaths of Prop 8 and DOMA I feel like I am standing in a completely different world. In fact...I am. And just as the destruction of the Death Star in  Star Wars was seen as an impossible task...so to was this. There were cries of joy....and great exhales of relief. That's how I feel today.

I know that tommorow will  bring new battles and more insane comments by people who simply will not let gay people get on with our lives. We know we have more work to do.....But today is a day to celebrate.

16 comments:

  1. Congratulations to you both, and to all loving and committed same-sex couples for whom today's events are a blessing.

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  2. Congratulations for all of us.

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  3. It's such an important and significant step on the road to equality, it should be marked down in our calendars to remember and celebrate every year.

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  4. Yay! Good riddance to both DOMA and Prop 8. The only good Republican, other than those supporting equality, are the weepy, wimper-y bigots crying themselves to sleep and wetting the bed! :-D

    I question the practicality or the advisability of doing this, but I have a recurrent fantasy of a gay militant group being formed patterned after the 1960’s Black Panthers called “The Gay Panthers.” I wouldn’t want it called “The Pink Panthers” because that’s too fem and not scary enough. Have them wear beret hats and dark glasses to give them that frightening edge the Black Panthers once had. But on rainbow tee shirts I would have them wear, there would be a message and graphic which would drive home the sentiment that we will most likely get widespread equality once the bigoted ol’ fogies die off. The front of these tee shirts would be a dig against Republicans reading “Die Bigoted Scum” alongside a cartoon graphic of a dead elephant hanging from a tree branch. The elephant’s face would be expressionless and without detail with the exception of “x’s” in place of eyes and a tongue, both indicating that at least this particular bigot is thankfully no longer with us. This fantasy is very dark and I admit that but, at the same time, it’s a delicious indulgence.

    Some comments on other channels have speculated about what would happen with a legally married gay couple’s access to federal benefits should they move to a vicious Republican theo-bigotocracy AKA a Red state. Can the Red state, whose constitution bars any relationship recognition for gay people, successfully interfere with a gay couple legally married elsewhere from receiving their federal benefits when those benefits will physically be received on that theo-bigotocracy’s soil? I went to law school decades ago and I admit I’m rusty at this, but I’m going to predict that, no, they cannot. And the reason is that such an attempt conceivably could be found to be an unconstitutional interference with interstate commerce. Blue equality states should not be reduced to the equivalent of Indian Reservations where legally married gay couples feel they have to forego better job opportunities in other (unfortunately red) states to avoid losing access to those federal benefits the Windsor case gave them. Such Red state interference and the moves to their state it prevented as well as additional interstate commerce it kept from happening might be enough to support a finding that they constitutionally crossed an impermissible line.

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    1. By the above, I am assuming the legally married gay couple would add to their application for federal benefits a certified copy of their marriage license obtained in the Equality state they got married in and that legally should overcome a Red state's attempt to block those benefits being received by gays on its soil.

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  5. Any pics of you guys in SF yesterday, hey?

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  6. Here in Ohio we still have nothing. But SCOTUS set up a path for all states to gain equality. Prop 8 WAS held unconstitutional by a federal court and the Supremes did not disagree. Prop 8 mirrors all of the other ballot initiatives across the country that denies us marriage rights. So..if it is unconstitutional in California then it surely is unconstitutional throughout the rest of the country. Let the lawsuits begin!

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    1. “But SCOTUS set up a path for all states to gain equality. Prop 8 WAS held unconstitutional by a federal court and the Supremes did not disagree.”

      Jim,

      While I would love it that you turned out to be correct, I’m doubtful at this point that you are. The Prop 8 case was thrown out for lack of standing (in the federal sense), so SCOTUS didn’t reach the merits in ANY way. We cannot infer disagreement or agreement with the underlying merits when this happens. Our only clue is what happened in the Windsor DOMA case, but that case was limited to what the FEDERAL government cannot do when individual states have seen fit to expand their own definition of marriage to include same-sex couples and gay people follow through and enter lawful marriages within their own states. States get to define marriages for themselves, NOT Congress. It’s the federal government who has been found to have violated equal protection, NOT the states at this point. It’s equally foreseeable that SCOTUS in the future will be content to allow redneck theo-bigotocracies to continue marriage discrimination under STATE law.

      What needs to happen is have a future marriage discrimation case against a STATE where it is challenged for denying equal protection under the 14th Amendment, not the 5th. It’s the 14th Amendment where equal protection requirements have been held to be applicable against the STATES.

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    2. Dave..I understand that it was thrown out because of "standing." I was referring to the original case which WAS proven unconstitutional by a federal court. The Supreme Court has not yet disagreed or has any desire to take that issue up so the lower court decision remains in place..and that case agreed that there is no "equal protection."

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  7. I am very happy to hear the wonderful news!

    Congratulations for your blog, love it :)

    www.facebook.com/DimMi.Author

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  9. It has been a long time and no new posts. We miss your blogs. Hope all is well with all of you!!

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  10. This video of you all for Spirit Day tomorrow is way too cute!!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9NBFJI9B_4

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  11. Man driven to suicide by ex wife and divorce courts


    Chris Mackney committed suicide on December 29, 2013 because his ex wife was using the divorce courts in America to torture him and kidnap his children from him. He wrote a 4 page suicide note before killing himself.

    http://www.brainsyntax.com/Portal/Material/1/Lasttestamentofalovingfatherabusedbythefamilycourtsystem.pdf


    LATEST UPDATE: The ex-wife is such a psychopath that is she trying to copyright her ex husband's suicide note, in order to prevent it from being circulated on the internet. She is using her lawyers to threaten legal action against websites that published Chris's suicide letter.

    The website "A Voice for Men" also got a letter from her lawyers and wrote an article about it yesterday:
    http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/family-courts/here-come-the-lawyers-to-avfm-yet-again/

    Here's a couple more updates:

    http://henrymakow.com/2014/04/Ex-Wife-Removes-Husbands-Suicide-Note-from-Internet.html

    http://www.crimesagainstfathers.com/usa/Forums/tabid/362/forumid/261/threadid/9799/scope/posts/Default.aspx

    http://www.techdirt.com/articles/20140425/11184127030/ex-wife-allegedly-using-copyright-to-take-down-husbands-suicide-note-where-he-blames-their-custody-battle.shtml

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