OCD Diaries: "Nothing To Fear But Fear Itself"

Its been some time since I first posted about having OCD. It was a very hard post to write and after I was done, I was content just to let it go for awhile. I had cracked the lid off a part of myself that I usually keep under tight lock and key in the hopes that I could find advice, support, and perhaps help someone else who might have been silently suffering as well...I found all of those things and more.

Since that first post, life has marched on...and it didn't give a dam about OCD. I finished one session of my OCD  support group and elected to return for another session that has only recently begun. My summer...while insanely fun...was also insanely busy. My kids activities kept me busy as well as hosting several YouTube friends during our "Big Gay Vacation" and more. This was not a summer of rest and that means I did not take a lot of time to face down my OCD and do the hard work it requires. Oftentimes I let my anxious thoughts and compulsions have their way rather than continue my exposure work or practicing my mindfulness meditations. The end result is a further boatload of guilt, but also a resolve to work harder when the next OCD group began....I was really gonna kick OCD's ass this time...I meant it.  But then, another major realization happened that reminded me that this is always going to be hard work.

What happened? Read on to find out...

Under The Cloud Of Fear

Fear is one of the most primal of human emotions. The biological mechanisms that produce fear are buried deep within a portion of our brain called the amygdala...a portion which has been dubbed "the reptilian brain" since it has been present since the age of dinosaurs and predates other brain structures responsible for emotion and logical thought. Indeed, all the brain structures responsible for "higher" thought are built around the structures responsible for survival instinct. Fear is an integral part of being human and neccesary to our survival...except when it seeks to dehumanize...

Fear is often the source of...and most common tool used in, discrimination. Many people throughout history have been the target of fear based discrimination which can seize on almost any detail of your being(gender,ethnicity, religion, etc.) and turn you into a shadowy threat working to destroy society.

In the national debate over homosexuality and its equal treatment under the law, fear is often evoked in an attempt to make us look like we are mindless monsters bent on destroying all life...dont believe me? Take a look..